I think you've made a great point. Talking about food and our preferences can make some feel guilty or intimidated. It may just be a great way to keep the small talk going with no intention of sharing life through a deeper conversation.

I take the challenge.

As a vegetarian, I feel challenged!

I do remember once going to the home of an elderly couple in my then-church for a meal and they served meat pies (a normal thing here in the UK!). I ate mine on the grounds that refusing what was set before me would be insulting. After the meal, my hostess said: 'I'm so glad you eat everything. I hate it when people are fussy and don't eat what they are given.' (Good call!)

I wonder if you or other readers think I shouldn't offer the information that I'm a vegetarian to people who don't know? I'm also wondering whether my vegetarianism intimidates people who already know.

I do agree with you on your general approach, though.

I agree with you, and have tried to fit my issues with food into what is being served. However, because I binge on desserts, I have, like an alcoholic with beer or wine, had to refuse desserts. I try not to make it an issue, but when I don't follow my food plan, I pay by binging later. I've been given the grace to "just taste" dessert at times, however. It usually works out best to pray to God to help me know what's right. I've become more flexible over time (God's will), and think I'm on the right track. I will need to look at whether I'm just trying to set myself apart through this, or whether it's a genuine need. Thanks!

This post strikes a chord with me! I love to entertain but some of the joy leaves when people start to tear apart the nutritional content of my meal and comment on what they can or can't eat. I have a friend who is a fussy eater, but it took me a long time to find out because he just took what was placed before him and did not complain. Eventually I discovered his preferences, but I appreciate that found our company more important than eating what he liked.

Lets put people first. Most of us can afford to stop on the way home and eat what pleases us if the meal is not up to our standards.

The most meaningful times in my life have been around the table, sharing Passover or the Lord's Supper, sharing what Jesus means to each of us. I have laughed and cried at these times and the memories of those special times remain and strengthen me at other times. To have known true fellowship and communion with fellow believers - those that are closer than family - is a blessing beyond my ability to describe. I can only be thankful that I was so blessed.

I appreciate your thoughtful comments. Thank you all.

Specifically in response to Pam, I thank you for sharing your story. I encourage people who follow specific eating plans (vegetarianism etc.) to remain so at home or in restaurants, but to be more open when receiving the graces of others. I agree that for some groups of people (my grandparents' generation specifically or people whose culture relates meat to riches) vegetarians can be very difficult to understand.

Fundamentally, it is not my goal to encourage people to replace one rule ("I do not eat meat," for instance) with another one. ("I will eat anything and everything set before me.") Instead, I want to encourage a new attitude and vision of food as ultimately relational and rather than individualistic.

I attended a meeting at our church recently and the topic of hospitality came up. It seems that many people would prefer to meet at a restaurant than to have people over to their home for a meal. Is it because we don't want the extra work? Is it because then everyone can order just what THEY want?

There was a time when people willingly opened their homes to share whatever they had and guests graciously accepted whatever was offered. When you open your home you are opening your life, inviting people into your life. There are conversations that will take place in a home that won't take place in a restaurant. Maybe you will even have an opportunity to share Christ.

If I have guests I might ask if they have allergies or medical reasons and cannot eat certain things. However, it is offensive to me if someone starts making specific dietary requests of CHOICE (i.e current diet, or vegan) It communicates to me that my choices aren't adequate for them. They could quietly choose not to eat certain things and still show acceptance of what is offered. Would you go to visit another country and tell your hosts that you only eat American food? I don't think so.
-- Carolyn

I appreciate the point you are trying to make here, but as someone with food allergies I don't feel that this pattern would work very well for the same reason that loving people matters. If I eat what causes me an allergic reaction, I will end up sick in bed instead of living with and serving others. It is awfully hard to commune with others when fighting allergic reactions in the body.

But I have found that it works well for me to bring my own meal to communal functions (usually some kind of leftovers). This only takes a moment to set up in advance and then allows the time together to be focused on community instead of on what I can or cannot eat.

Dearest sisters in Christ!!! I find nothing thoughtful about the comments that have been made. By the grace of God you do not suffer severe food allergies or Celiac disease! If you did, you would not make such bold and unwise comments.

Let me introduce myself. I am a Christian mother of four wonderfully and fearfully made children of God. Each of our four children (ages 10 - 3 yrs) suffer from multiple severe food allergies. Each child has their own set of foods that will cause them to have a deadly reaction. Just stop now and think about that for a minute. Imagine my daily walk will you? Let's just talk about milk for instance...one child can have soy, but not dairy, another can have dairy, but not soy, another cannot have dairy or soy, only rice. Do you get the picture?

In addition, myself and two of the four children were recently diagnosed with an auto immune disorder called Celiac disease. A person who suffers from Celiac cannot consume even the smallest amount of gluten (protein found in all wheat, rye, barley and some oats) without causing serious damage to the intestinal lining. Consumption of gluten ignites an inflammatory response in the intestine which destroys the villi, which are responsible for the uptake of vital nutrients, vitamins and minerals. There is no cure for this disease and the only treatment is a lifelong, Rigorous gluten free diet. Failure to follow this diet causes multitude of very serious health problems.

Check these diseases into the closet while we go out and enjoy all the delights enjoyed by those such as yourselves? We would be delighted to! Carefree dining, vacationing, socializing, celebrating...certainly where do we sign up?

Would any loving, kind, understanding, compassionate Christian advise us to "quietly choose not to eat certain things and still show acceptance of what is offered," as one post suggests? If I were to "quietly take what is offered to me", I would be quiet alright..I would be dead quiet...at your dinner table! I am thinking that would be the last social you hosted.

To put this into perspective for you. How about if I invite you to my house and go to much trouble to welcome you with a wonderful casserole laced with just a small of cheese flavored rat poison? In this case, will you be able to (as suggested by one of the posts) - "be more open when receiving the graces of others."? Hum...suddenly when we are talking about YOU eating poison it doesn't sound like such a good idea anymore does it? This is paramount to what you are suggesting those with restricted diets should do in your glorious presence! My dearest friends....food IS poison to those who suffer severe food allergies and Celiac disease!!!

Perhaps someone could help me by laying out the specific steps that my family should take to develop, as suggested by another post "....a new attitude and vision of food as ultimately relational and rather than individualistic."

I could go on...because there is much more to the story, but I think you get the picture.

Sorry to bust your chops sisters, but please look at this as an opportunity evaluate your words and actions toward other people. As another post suggests "Let's put people first". Where is your love for your neighbors in their time of affliction, illness and suffering. Rather than criticize, thank our Lord that you enjoy a life where you can eat what you choose and ask for understanding and wisdom to minister and provide his love and support to those who are not as fortunate. I will pray for your increased understanding and compassion. I strongly urge you to pray for my family and others like us for whom each meal presents a minefield to be carefully navigated.

Anyone want to come over and help me go grocery shopping for gluten free items (by the way they are 5 times more expensive than typical items - see for yourself), navigate dinner preparation around all these deadly allergies? I will accept all offers!

God bless!

Food is an important part of religious observance and spiritual ritual for many faiths including Christianity, Judaism, Islam, Hinduism and Buddhism. The role of food in cultural practices and religious beliefs is complex and varies among individuals and communities. Any introduction to such a diverse and complex topic will not be able to include everything. Instead, here is a sample of some ways in which various religious groups include food as a vital part of their faith.