Kyria's Gifted for Leadership

Comments

Good insights, Nancy. A lot of what I do is to encourage women in our ministry to find their voices and to use them well. Many women have a strong voice in a female group, but as soon as they are in a mixed group, they seem to lose it. We all lose when that happens. So we try to help them build their capacity to contribute well and that grows their confidence. Learning to believe God really has given them something to say provides the courage to speak up.

Posted By: Judy Douglass | April 15, 2008 1:45 PM

Thanks, Nancy. As a young woman, I resonate with the pressure to suppress my true voice in order to communicate more confidently and effectively. However, as I mature in Christ, I often find those around me respond most warmly not to a perceived fortress of strength, but to an authenticity that can only come from a place of honesty and vulnerability. Discovering and using our true voice unlocks an ability to lead others with a stark and beautiful humility that gives glory to Christ rather than ourselves.

Posted By: Bonnie M | April 15, 2008 1:57 PM

For me, my true voice is being spoken (even if not being heard) when I know I am telling the truth: no editing and no censoring. That doesn't mean I don't use tact, wisdom, and appropriateness for given settings or audiences; rather, that I'm aware of when I'm holding back, keeping things in, feeling fear or anxiety, not saying what I most deeply and truly want and need to articulate and then speaking anyway - no matter the cost or risk. Easier said than done.

I'm learning that what is heard might need to take second place to what I actually say. Being heard will come, hopefully, in time; saying what I know and believe, in the moment and all the time, is what matters most...that's my true voice - spoken, out there, and worth being heard!

Thanks, Nancy, for your kind and powerful reminder!

Posted By: Ronna | April 15, 2008 11:32 PM

I discovered my true voice when I came to understand, accept and embrace my unique personality blend. I gave myself permission to be me. I've found that most women waste energy comparing and trying to be someone they are not. When we're resting in our unique God-given personhood people can tell we're authentic; it rings true and we feel more confident.

Posted By: acoon | April 17, 2008 8:17 AM

All of the above comments speak to me. These women have certainly found their voice. I gained my voice when I lost my fear. I no longer try to project to others that I am perfect. As appropriate I own my weaknesses, failures, and if needful, my sins. When I developed a friendship with a person who allows me, on a regular basis, to confess sin, and who prays for me, I was no longer afraid to be who I am. God has blessed this openess with a kind of influence I never thought possible - but now I have discovered - influence must be used very carefully. Those with influence must be aware they will judged more strictly (James 3:1)

Posted By: Dottie | April 18, 2008 9:42 AM

I think too often we are quick to make our struggles a gender issue--women vs. men--especially in ministry or the public eye. Finding our own voice, a voice of honesty and truth, is not unique to women in leadership, in the church, in politics, or otherwise. Even men struggle in this regard, sometimes even the greatest and the strongest of them...remember Moses? Finding our voices is being confident in ourselves and in what we speak, and most of all in ministry, being confident of God's purpose and what He would have us speak. I've seen mediocre or inexperienced young pastors suddenly become men of strength and character--men to be heard--because they found their own unique purpose in their ministry. Same with women leaders. Especially when they begin to speak from their hearts and not just their knowledge. I believe God intended for ministry to be personal. And I think it's the same for all of us. Our confidence arises and our voice is discovered when we take what we know in our heads, join it with what we know in our hearts,and speak with passion and assurance the words God would have us speak. There is a reason that Jesus encouraged each of us to love Him with ALL of our mind, heart, soul, and strength. I believe His greatest desire and purpose is that we speak from THIS love.

Posted By: sheri | April 18, 2008 9:54 AM

It's interesting; we've been having this very same conversation on our denomination's blog for women in leadership. Both in preaching and in meetings I find that it is helpful to all my hearers when I know what I want to say, and when I am able to give it the emotional weight it really holds for me. Early training in acting, ironically, has helped me keep head and heart working together!

Posted By: Cindy Nicholson | April 18, 2008 1:23 PM

Nice article, Nancy. Thank you.

When it comes to leadership in the community, or government, or other social gatherings of people I think you are right on about having your own voice.

But when it comes to the Church, I think the voice that one should be shooting for is the voice of God. Relaying in an understandable and relevant manner that Word of God's Law and that Word of His Promises. This can be done in a myriad of styles and fashions as long as the "voice" doesn't seek to overwhelm or change the message of the gospel and try to put the onus on the listener or the preacher or leader, but rather keeps God's voice central.

Thanks so much!

- Steve Martin San Clemente, CA

Posted By: Steve Martin | April 19, 2008 12:38 PM

True, Steve, we need to hear the voice of God, and it should be primary. But why is it when I've been to a conference or heard a recording where somebody like my pastor, Fred Wolfe is there, or somebody like Mark Driscoll or John Piper or John MacArthur "lets it fly," I start sounding remarkably like them? In a world that continues to churn out its heroes, somebody has to say, "Before God, it's not just OK - it's mandatory to be YOU!"

Posted By: Andy Wood | April 20, 2008 3:16 PM

I agree with those who write that God speaks through us uniquely as persons.

I remember hearing another woman preach during my preaching class in seminary. She had a very soft gentle voice, similar to mine. What struck me as I listened to her was the authority in her words that came through along with her gentleness. From that day on, I stopped trying to make my voice sound different than it naturally sounds (although I continue to work on projecting so people can hear me).

As I read this article and comments, I also remembered one of the most unforgettable sermons I ever heard. The preacher was a man, as it happened. Someone in the church had written a very critical anonymous letter about some young people who had started to come to our services and the way they were behaving. (They were smoking in the parking lot, for example.) Our pastor read the letter to us and explained what was wrong with it, the hatefulness of the attitude underlying it, the problem with its being anonymous. As he did so, identifying with those who were hurt by the letter, he wept. His tears said as much or more than his words.

Posted By: Denise | June 9, 2008 3:54 PM

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