Who's Afraid of Critical Women?
April 28, 2009 |
A few weeks ago, I got an email from a woman who had had reviewed my book on her blog. While she had mostly good things to say about it, she took issue with one of my first chapters (on the ways motherhood changes a woman). So, she graciously invited me to respond to her critiques.
So I went to her post, read the review, and starting mulling over my response to her. She had raised some good points, offered some valid arguments. And although she didn't sway me, she did make me think. So much so, that while I was still lost in my thoughts, I got another email from her. This time, she said she took down her post. And she apologized! She happened to be a frequent commenter on my Mommy Revolution blog and explained that she didn't "want to be divisive or create any controversy."
I didn't have to think long about how to respond to this!
Continue reading...Posted by Caryn Rivadeneira on April 28, 2009 | Comments (9)
Food for Thought
April 27, 2009 |
Who are you trying to please? For many in Christian leadership, the things we want to do, must do, or feel called to do get crowded out by the things we feel we should do. There are always more should-do's being shouted in our direction. The process of adding should-do's to your workweek, however, means you end up continually busy, with an emotional tank near empty. Why do we allow others to "should" all over us? For many, it's because our sense of worth is too fragile to handle disappointing others. We find solace in knowing others approve but guilt when we don't meet others' expectations. If the following statements sound like you, it's an indication your busyness may come from a fragile sense of worth.
Continue reading...Posted by Bonnie McMaken on April 27, 2009 | Comments (1)
The Final Church Barrier for Women: Church Planter
April 25, 2009 |
I just came back from the Exponential Conference, the nation's largest conference for church planters. I loved it. Nearly 2,700 church planters, apostles, cultural missionaries, entrepreneurs, and crazy people - the kind who take "It's never been done that way before" as a dare. My friend Dave Ferguson and a team help guide the conference, and he and his brother, Jon, are geniuses at creating life-giving cultures. Exponential is one: attenders focus on reaching people far from God, so they drop sectarian emphases and doctrinal disputes and come together for vision, teaching, prayer. Speakers and attenders represent Anglo, African-American, Asian, Latino and other cultures. Plenary sessions were led by pastors from India and Indonesia.
But where are the women?
Continue reading...Posted by Kevin Miller on April 25, 2009 | Comments (21)
Gifted To Lead
April 24, 2009 |
Tonight I'm at a hotel in Toronto, sandwiched between two "Gifted to Lead" events. Yesterday, Nancy Ortberg and I co-led the event in Livermore, California, with about 340 women. We were graciously hosted by the Cornerstone Fellowship Church. Every time we open up this subject matter - focused on the challenges and potential for women to lead in the church - we realize how needful it is for women to be able to talk about their stories and learn from one another. I was marked once again by the incredible gifts of the women I had a chance to talk with personally - their passion for the church and their desire to make an impact for the kingdom. I was inspired to keep on persevering for the cause of Christ.
Continue reading...Posted by Caryn Rivadeneira on April 24, 2009 | Comments (3)
Why I Bought the Green Bible
April 22, 2009 |
Happy Earth Day! I'd like to take advantage of this special time when our thoughts are focused on the planet to talk about the Green Bible, last year's release from HarperOne. In case you missed the hullabaloo, this book is a NRSV Bible that includes a 100% natural cover (created in an environmentally-friendly plant), soy-based inks, and 10% post-consumer paper with the rest originating from "well-managed forests." It includes essays, Bible studies, poetry, and other environment-related commentary from today's leading Christian environmentalists. But the real difference is in the text itself: verses which reference nature or creation - over 1,000 of them - are printed in green ink.
Our friends down the hall at Christianity Today magazine and the Out of Ur blog reviewed the Bible and had little to say by way of compliments. Brandon O'Brien found the Green Bible interesting, but not particularly useful, and Telford Work called it "an ideological fashion accessory, and a vehicle for promoting conventional progressive environmentalism." If that sounds a bit harsh, you should read the blog comments from readers appalled at this Bible's seeming plant-and-animal worship.
Let me add a different voice to the debate and submit that this is a valuable and enriching addition to your Bible collection.
Continue reading...Posted by Caryn Rivadeneira on April 22, 2009 | Comments (4)
Food for Thought
April 20, 2009 |
When Christ wanted to teach his disciples how to treat each other, he realized that experiencing something is more life changing than words alone. So Jesus got up from the meal, took off his outer garments, and began washing their dusty feet - a service usually relegated to the lowliest servant. Then, based on the powerful experience they'd just shared, he taught his disciples about serving each other.
Posted by Bonnie McMaken on April 20, 2009 | Comments (1)
The Silent Retreat
April 17, 2009 |
I have a hard time "unplugging." My morning starts with a sleepy-eyed click on email, and most nights I turn in only after checking Facebook. Yet recently it seems God is calling me to spend time plugged in to him - only him.
Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love, throws down this challenge: "In our crazy world, silence and stillness are two of the true remaining luxuries. You have to work hard to create those sacred pockets of stillness for yourself." The impetus for her yearlong journey of self-discovery was a divorce and ensuing depression: "More than anything, I needed peace. And modern life, for all its conveniences and all its opportunities, doesn't offer that. We almost have too many options."
Last summer some friends and I read Ruth Haley Barton's Sacred Rhythms, which echoed Gilbert's findings. Barton invited us to "unplug" using the ancient spiritual practice of solitude. As a self-imposed assignment, we attended a silent weekend at Montserrat Jesuit Retreat House—a bold feat for three women addicted to technology. The retreat center has a "no electronics allowed" policy.
Posted by Caryn Rivadeneira on April 17, 2009 | Comments (8)
Creative Team Building
April 13, 2009 |
The NTSB official adamantly explained how the crew and passengers survived a near catastrophe in the incredible forced water landing of US Airways flight 1549 on the Hudson River in New York City back in January. The crew worked as a team, not as individuals - and that saved the lives of all 155 people aboard.
The message was clear: when individuals know how to work together as a team, it makes all the difference in the world.
The plus for women is that we to tend to move toward the team model intuitively, out of our instinctive desire for community. Let's look at characteristics of a team that can translate both to the workplace and ministry context:
Posted by Caryn Rivadeneira on April 13, 2009 | Comments (4)
A Picture of Love and Leadership
April 10, 2009 |
This morning I read through John 19. Typical Good Friday reading since it tells the story of the sentencing and crucifixion of Jesus Christ. Of course, I've read this passage a zillion times before, but this morning, I had this blog on my mind and the drastically different images of leadership - in relationship to love and pride - struck me, particularly in the verses 17 through 30.
Check it out:
"So they took Jesus away. Carrying the cross by himself, he went to the place called Place of the Skull (in Hebrew, Golgotha). There they nailed him to the cross. Two others were crucified with him, one on either side, with Jesus between them. And Pilate posted a sign over him that read, ?Jesus of Nazareth, the King of the Jews.' The place where Jesus was crucified was near the city, and the sign was written in Hebrew, Latin, and Greek, so that many people could read it.
"Then the leading priests objected and said to Pilate, ?Change it from "The King of the Jews" to "He said, I am King of the Jews."'
"Pilate replied, ?No, what I have written, I have written.'
Posted by Caryn Rivadeneira on April 10, 2009 | Comments (3)
The Devastating Power of a Church-Harpy
April 7, 2009 |
I knew a woman once who, with super-spy-like verbal finesse, single-handedly took down an entire church. Ka-pow! The congregation exists no more.
I knew another woman who waged a stealth war to get her church secretary fired. Before the campaign ended, the secretary quit, left the church, lost most of her friends, and entered into a deep depression.
Oh, and I knew another woman - a stately matron of the church - whose "helpful ideas" (i.e. biting critiques) so discouraged a new Christian eager to get involved in ministry that her sense of personal value will be devastated for years to come.
What did these three women have in common? They were women's ministry leaders.
Posted by Caryn Rivadeneira on April 7, 2009 | Comments (28)
The Waiting Place
April 4, 2009 |
In his book, Oh, the Places You'll Go, Dr. Seuss writes about something he calls "a most useless place:" The Waiting Place. It is "for people just waiting.
Waiting for a train to go
or a bus to come, or a plane to go
or the mail to come, or the rain to go
or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow
or waiting around for a Yes or No
or waiting for their hair to grow.
Everyone is just waiting."
While I'm not waiting around for public transportation or a new hairstyle, The Waiting Place is where I find myself reluctantly lingering these days. Ironically, I've been waiting to snap out of it.
Posted by Caryn Rivadeneira on April 4, 2009 | Comments (9)
